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You big bully


For the first time in ages we were actually spending an evening together, I couldn’t believe it.

Max was having a small house party in Trento, shall we go along?

Of course, I’d love to. (what’s this all about?)

We drove down in Enrico’s new baby, his Mitsubishi Evo 7, at least I think it was the seven, as the 8th version came after we’d split up!

Trento was lovely and hot and the evening was bubbling with excitement. First we had to go to a couple of places as Enrico had to see people and we also popped into the restaurant Cuel had opened up. It was beautiful, so chic and contemporary. It looked like the kind of place only the rich would be allowed to go to, white crisp linen tablecloths, waiters wearing long aprons down to their shoes and a menu that was oh so expensively delicious.

We had an aperitivo and jumped back into the car to make our way round to Max’s. The evening was brilliant, food, wine and a lot of laughter and it wasn’t until I looked at my watch that I saw it was already 2 in the morning. Gulp!

I had to be at work at 9am as fresh as a daisy as I was running the ‘Foreign Office’ at Folgaria Vacanze, a job I loved, and I had an important meeting the next day with a new contact I’d been after for ages, I wanted his groups holidaying in our resort.

I made my way over to Enrico and gently mentioned it was getting late, maybe we should be making our way home now?

You had to be ever so careful with him as he could fly off the handle at any moment so I really did use my kindest, sweetest voice with a huge smile thrown in for good luck.

Yeah, sure, we’ll go in a minute, he acknowledged. (Blimey that was easy?)

Cool, I sat back down in one of the hardest seats in the room as I was beginning to feel quite tired by now. Max was lovely, the perfect host, Can I get you a drink? Would you like some tea? No, no I’m fine thanks, don’t worry about me.

He had just shown Enrico a new product he’d found, sticks in a jar that soaked up an essence and left a perfume in the room which was really pleasing. Enrico was very interested and thinking of getting some for the hotel and so their chat went on.

3 o’clock my watch said and I just wanted my bed. It had been a lovely evening but with a good 45 minute journey to get home I thought it was time we started to make a move.

I asked Enrico nicely again if we could leave. I mentioned in front of Max our host that I had to be up in a few hours for work and very understandingly he agreed.

‘Of course, it’s getting so late, come on Enrico, take your wife home,’ followed by more raucous laughter.

Enrico finished his drink and we said our goodbyes. I know he’d had quite a few drinks and I had seen him smoke a joint with the others. There may have been some cocaine too but I wasn’t entirely sure but in Italy the drink driving laws were pretty lax and most people thought nothing of jumping in a car and driving off after a night on the tiles.

As we drove along there was a deadly quiet in the car so I tried to break it up saying what a lovely evening it had been but I was getting no response, just his foot pushing harder and harder on the accelerator. We were on the main road running from Trento to Rovereto, the Strada Statale, and he was speeding.

‘Enrico, you’re going to fast, slow down.’

If only I had kept my mouth shut. Down went his foot on the accelerator and off his beloved Mitsubishi sped in response. We took the turning for Folgaria at God-Only-Knows-km-per-hour and I tugged on my seatbelt to make sure it was secure. I was frightened and felt sick with fear.

He raged up the mountain road fully driven by his overwhelming anger his beloved car screeching round every bend and hanging onto the asphelt for dear life. How dare I ruin the evening? Why did I always have to break up such good fun?

It’s three in the morning Enrico, I have to work in the morning whereas you can lie in until you wake. I’m sorry, you know I work, you should’t have invited me.

Down his foot went on the pedal again to show me just how angry he was.

He took the hairpin bends at stupid speeds completely unaware of just what an idiot he was being, totally consumed with his anger.

‘Stop! Stop!’ I shouted. ‘You’ll kill us.’

He slammed his foot on the break and the car shrieked to a halt throwing us forward and then back against the seat.

‘Get out and walk if you don’t like it.’

I could have got out but we were only just above Mezzamonte meaning I would have had a good two-hour walk UP the mountain to get home, my practicality took the better of me and I stayed in the car and shut up! I knew if I had got out he wouldn’t have come back for me.

‘Can you please just take me home?’ I murmured.

He didn’t sleep at home that night. He dropped me off and sped off in his flash car. The next time I saw him was four days later when we parted our ways and I became a separated woman.

This post was written for Josie’s Writing Workshop #24 I chose prompt 4

4. Have you ever felt bullied? At school? At work? In your personal life? How did you deal with that? Tell us your story.
– Inspired by Mummy Tips and her post about feeling the affects of bullying this week

Writing workshop


10 Comments leave one →
  1. 20/05/2010 4:19 pm

    What a powerful piece of writing. I’m so sorry that you had to have the experience to be able to write it. So glad I’ve found your blog!

    • 21/05/2010 12:24 pm

      Thank you for the compliment and very nice to see you too, I shall pop over when I’m done here and say hello!

  2. 20/05/2010 7:47 pm

    What a big bully!

    From I’ve read about him, I don’t like him very much.


    • 21/05/2010 12:25 pm

      But he was very good (and still is) at covering it up, only those close know the real man. It’s also very therapeutic writing it down and getting it out of my system once and for all.

  3. 20/05/2010 9:42 pm

    God Mari, what a powerful post. You really brought it to life, how scared you must have been, walking on egg shells, forever on duty having to think of the ‘right’ words. No life and such a contrast to the vibrant lady you appear to be these days!

    • 21/05/2010 12:27 pm

      I’m glad it read well and I’m doubly glad it’s in the past. I’m lucky enough these days to b in arelationship where I’m accepted for who I am and have no duties to perform other than be happy, to be honest it’s the only way.

  4. 20/05/2010 10:45 pm

    :O oh my god, that must have been terrifying in the car. He sounds like an awful man, I’m glad you got out of the relationship. Definitely a big bully.

    • 21/05/2010 12:29 pm

      Hi Livi 🙂
      Yes, I’m glad it’s all over too and if nothing else if anyone happens to read and think they are acting the same way
      as I was, ie meek, humble and trying to keep the peace, then maybe it will nudge them to think a little more about what they want from life.

  5. porridgebrain permalink
    23/05/2010 9:43 pm

    Oh Mari 😦

    That sounds so scary. Not nice. I’m glad you didn’t stay with him. Very, very brave of you. I was with a man like that once and I know the courage it takes to leave.

    Much love to you xxxx

    • 24/05/2010 12:20 pm

      Excellent therapy writing about it as it allows me to let it all go and maybe will give my two older children an insight to why I left for the UK, one day when they’re ready.

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